Please Mr. Santaklaus

Here are some fancy gift ideas for the special giftee in your life.

Glass Snowman with Faux Snowballs. Sure it's not advertised as such, but if you look at the label, it says "Snowman with Snowballs". It's not life-sized, ladies. Sorry.

I Love Trent Lott Accessories. Is it the helmet hair? Is it the leadership that he used to exude in the Senate?? Is it the resolve with which he accepted his demotion from Senate Majority Leader???? I guess... Let the world know that you love Trent Lott, and just watch the world try to steal Trent away from you.

"Dokken Parking Only" Sign. This is a must have for those who provide parking for the members of Dokken. The sign clearly indicates that all non-Dokken-affiliated cars will be towed.

We all know that Jesus is the Reason for the Season. So you should get your kid or obsessive action-figure collector on your list some of these biblical action figures. You can also get them some of the same action figures in darker colors.

Bacon Strips Adhesive Bandages. Confuse the hell out of your dog!

Free Spectacles for one-eared man. Enough said.